Harboring Hostel Hostility

The point of this post is: Always bring earplugs.

There ya go, now you can decide if you want to read the rest.

I don't want you to get me wrong here; hostels are a great way to meet people and be centrally located in cities without spending 500 per night. The problem I had this weekend, is that I made a rookie mistake. So take notes, weary travelers! Here's some things to remember when booking your 10 Euro room.

1. Evaluate what a good night's sleep is worth to you
If you're willing to sleep in the same bunk room as 40 other strangers, you're definitely going to save some cash. But when you add up the number of cups of coffee you will have to buy to make up for sleep you lost, it may work out to be the same as paying the extra 30 bucks to upgrade to a private dorm. The exception to this rule comes if you are a heavy sleeper.

1b. Evaluate how heavy of a sleeper you are
When I say heavy sleeper, I mean you are the snorer. The thing about hostels is you should always expect to sleep a little less than wonderfully... and if you did sleep wonderfully, you're probably the reason everyone around you didn't. So, if you can sleep with yourself (how punny) knowing that you may be glared at all day, then more power to you.

2. Bring top of the line headphones
When Snorey McSnorerson woke me up at 3:35am, it only took a few seconds to realize that I was not going to be sleeping any time soon. I grabbed my headphones, set the volume to max, and could still hear the guy. This is the ONLY time I thought to myself, "Yes, Devin was totally justified in buying those seemingly-ridiculous, why-would-you-ever-need-those-really, Beats by Dre noise-canceling headphones."


3. Be prepared.
Throw things at the culprits. You're going to need a lot q-tips, or maybe something even heavier than cotton, ie: anything else. While Snorewise Gamgee was still sawing away, I rummaged through my purse and toiletries bag. At that time it seemed like natural instinct to throw a few q-tips, and when that didn't work, I threw a couple bobby pins. (Note: It's not just snorers that will wake you up. People with no regard for others will have loud conversations right next to you. I think you should throw things at them too. They just might look at you a little funny.)

4. Make light of it
Take a video. Laugh a little at the misfortune of your situation. Try to remix their snoring with a favorite song of yours, or just wait a few more minutes, and the guy in the next room over will also be snoring loud enough to make it seem that the two are doing a sort of snoring mating call back and forth with one another.  Listen closely and you'll hear what I'm talking about..

5. Create a proper sleeping playlist 

Here's what I ended up with once I finally got adjusted (and tired) enough to just "ignore" the Snormtrooper after an hour and a half. Norah Jones is the sleepy-time playlist goddess, and the others have become my faves over the years. 

...The next night I used earplugs. I slept like a baby who just learned how to sleep like a baby in a hostel. Thank you, Munich! Goodnight!